


A Lonely September

by mikaminato



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on Plain White T's Song, Declarations Of Love, Drama & Romance, Feelings, Feels, Happy Ending, Hurt, Hurt Liam, Idiots in Love, Liam Dunbar Needs a Hug, M/M, POV Liam, Romance, Sad with a Happy Ending, True Love, broken liam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-03
Updated: 2017-11-03
Packaged: 2019-01-28 20:49:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12615196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikaminato/pseuds/mikaminato
Summary: "Those simple three words slipped Theo’s mouth easily as Liam buried his face on the curve of his neck, like those simple words would heal the all the wounds, sorrows and every lost nights between tears and suffering.And something inside Liam told him it did. He didn’t know it was his heart, his wolf or his brain, but he felt warmth invade him, despite the cold weather."  [Theo/Liam]





	A Lonely September

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is based on Plain White T's song _[A Lonely September](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d_QK-sXBPAA)_
> 
> Hope you guys like it. :)
> 
> Thanks a lot everyone for reading. 
> 
> (this is a "short" one, what a miracle hoho)

He was sitting on a bench in Beacon Hills Park in a particularly cold September autumn morning, watching the sea of broken orange leaves on the floor, thinking - maybe for the thousandth - time about _him_. He sighed as every good memory invaded his mind, a small sad smile dancing on his lips, his heart tightening little more inside of him. Those memories weren’t there on purpose.

 

Liam just wasn’t strong enough to fight against them. It was a battle he knew he couldn’t win.

 

Those thoughts pleased him though, it made him feel bittersweet. They would be amazing if they weren’t already part of a happy past he knew it wasn’t coming back. It was sad he had become such a pathetic person to the point of living from what was left of the person that used to be his everything. Liam still closed his eyes and remembered the sweet taste of his kisses and how protected Theo used to make him feel whenever he wrapped his arms around him. He even recalled with a bittersweet longing their bickering, their silly fights and the way they used to push each other guts, even after so many years of being together.

 

After the war was over, they both moved on with their lives. Theo moved to Liam’s home for a while until he gathered enough money to get a small apartment for himself. They both finished school and went to college, but they stayed in Beacon Hills. Maybe because they felt like they needed to protect the town, maybe because they wanted to stay together. Liam got a job too, so their schedule was pretty busy, but they always made time for each other. It didn’t matter what they would do, as long as they were together.

 

They would each junk food, fool around, talk about silly stuff, and laugh about anything and everyone. Liam used to say Theo was mean, but would always laugh at his venomous remarks.

 

And the werewolf felt like the tightness on his chest was unbearable whenever he thought that times like this would never come back.

 

He turned his gaze to the lake, a few feet from the bench he was sitting on, smiling at the memory of when he shoved the chimera on it. Soaked, the chimera had rushed towards the werewolf, practically frothing in rage. Liam had run, laughing, Theo chasing after the werewolf, making a wet path with his wet clothes. When the older boy reached him, he wrapped his arms around the smaller teenager, also making the boy wet. Theo lifted Liam and spun him around, just like you would do to a little child, ignoring the disapproving eyes from other people that were in the park. And then Theo kissed him, wet and warm at the same time.

 

Of course none of this was planned. Who could have guessed Liam would end up falling in love with Theo Raeken, of all people? After the war, things certainly changed between them, but he didn’t exactly know then the barrier between friendship and love was broken, and the hardest part was realizing at first and then, accepting that.

 

But Liam wondered if it was possible not to fall in love with Theo. It seemed... Unfair. Theo was his friend, his safe harbor, his _anchor_. Theo accepted him as he was, not judging his anger, not mocking his IED, helping him controlling his hardest enemy: his emotions, always supporting him and making him feel safe. Liam, being the hot-blooded person he always had been, declared his feelings on an impulse, not thinking that maybe it was a selfish act.

 

He lost the count on how many times Theo denied his feelings. But never once the chimera changed his behavior or made things weird between them.

 

But he still recalled like it was yesterday the way Theo looked away when he said maybe he liked him back. And the “you" and "I” became “us”. Liam couldn’t be happier.

 

Words were never necessary and just an exchange of looks was all it took to know what the other was thinking. The best part of their relationship was that even if they had been friends for a good amount of time, and even after having each other’s company for so long, there were so many things they still didn’t know about each other. Throughout the time, Liam learned Theo had so many good sides and so much kindness inside of him, even if the chimera didn’t allow anyone to see it. Liam felt honored he could witness that and the goofy and sappy part of him couldn’t stop the thought he got even more perfect as time went by. It was surreal. He often couldn’t believe the same person he had set free from Hell was there, being the most important part of his life, and sometimes he had a cliché thought Theo wasn’t real. And worse: being with him, belonging to him. He felt happy, and he felt scared at the same time.

 

Liam wouldn’t change anything that happened. If he could, he would spend those moments all over again, with the false hope something would change in a new present. If he could go back to the past, maybe he should have done something differently so maybe Theo would still be there and the present wouldn’t hurt so much.

 

The werewolf wondered if the older boy still thought about those times when they traveled on holidays, even if it was to a city nearby, just to escape the reality, to let go of their duties. Forget about their jobs, the studies, the supernatural, the hunters, and just enjoy each other’s company. It may sound petty and smug, but Liam doubted Theo could be happier now than when they were together.

 

The beta wondered if living for him wasn’t enough. And if it wasn’t, what would it be?

 

If Theo had told him what was missing in their relationship, Liam would have tried, without thinking twice. It wasn’t like he didn’t try to forget about Theo. Of course he did. He tried so hard, but even after so long, he still closed his eyes and saw Theo. He still pictured his beautiful eyes and stealthy smiles.

 

This was going to be the first Christmas he was going to spend without Theo. The chimera always mocked about Liam’s gluttony and how they still had to toast with champagne even if they couldn’t get drunk, commenting that “another shitty year is ending and we’re still together”. The first Christmas’ Eve without his acid jokes, presents, cards and… Without Theo saying he loved him.

 

They were fighting a lot because Theo was working extra-shifts and Liam was busy on arranging college’s final paper and work so they didn’t see each other very often, so things were not easy. Liam used to say he couldn’t stand their fights anymore. He constantly said he wanted to stay away as far away as possible from him, because his life was becoming a nightmare, thanks to him. Their fights were heated and Liam usually said things he didn't mean to due to his EID and Theo knew that. Fuck, he even missed the fights.

 

He loved their memories. Every single one of them.

 

Liam just wanted Theo to hug him once more and tell him everything would be ok, like he had told him so many times after a bad fight; like he had told him after the fight against a hunter, against a supernatural creature, after _their_ fights. He just wanted Theo to assure him things would he fine, even if he knew they wouldn’t.

 

Just… one more chance.

 

He knew the best thing to do would be giving up and accept that it wasn’t meant to be and move on with his life. To try one more time, and maybe he would succeed. But he didn’t and he probably won’t. Liam knew that if Theo showed up in that very moment, he would throw himself on his arms without thinking about the consequences, not taking into account things that may have changed on the older boy and between them. He could almost laugh at his lack of self-preservation.

 

Everything was so damn pathetic he still didn’t even gather enough courage to get rid of the many things that reminded him of Theo: in their house, their room, in his life. Even after so many washes, Liam smelled Theo on them. He didn’t know if it was his mind or heart playing pranks on him, or maybe his wolf that was also longing him so much to the point his sense of smell was odd, but the scent was still there. Maybe he had become crazy, paranoid; foolish. Liam couldn’t even be sure he hasn’t become one.

 

He still lay on his bed, clinging to the damn overcoat Theo gave him when he turned nineteen. They used to share clothes once in a while, and part of Liam’s brain smelled the chimera on it. Almost like a routine, he hugged the piece of clothing with all his might as if it was going to bring him back, or at least lessen the pain inside his chest.

 

Liam wished Theo had been a bastard. He wished he had hurt his feelings to the point he would feel nothing but hatred or scorn for him. He wanted Theo’s kisses weren’t so tender, his hands weren’t so soft and his touches weren’t so comforting.

 

But things didn’t happen the way we wanted them to, right?  

 

Even if unconsciously, Liam still hoped Theo would show up on the door of their apartment, saying he missed him. He wished he would come and say all this time only made him love him even more and this time, it would be forever, like he had said many times before. Liam still peeked out of the window of their room once in a while, hoping to catch a glimpse of his figure wearing his typical smirk.

 

He would like to smile at everything they went through and understand that they were now a beautiful memory inside his heart and he should be happy to have them. Liam should feel ready to seek his own happiness, but he couldn’t. He just wanted Theo to hold him tight, at least one last time.

 

Theo always said Liam was strong, but now he realized he was too weak to walk on his own legs. Corey and Mason still visited him regularly when they were off from their work; the rest of the pack regularly had meetings on Beacon Hills, and Nolan and Alec were always there with him, but half of him was gone and he couldn’t do nothing about it.

 

He knew he was loved. He only was sorry it wasn’t just as much as he loved him. What hurt Liam the most it wasn’t the fact that Theo broke up with him, but having his fairy tale taken away from him so abruptly. They used to spend hours talking about the future, with flowers and happy endings, just like in soap operas or movies. Liam did the most talking, but Theo smiled as he listened and seemed happy, so the werewolf thought he was just as excited as he was.

 

He was sure his biggest mistake was not realizing he was living a reality, and falling in love hard was not meant for real people.

 

He didn’t blame him. Liam was thankful for their happiness. He just blamed himself for being so reckless.

 

He just wondered if it was wrong to want to be with the person you love.

 

Liam would be lying if he said he didn’t want to be by Theo’s side and be given another chance, even if Liam himself did nothing wrong. He was ready to apologize and say he was sorry. He was willing to do anything to soothe the emptiness inside his chest.

 

Liam just couldn’t get rid of the chains that held him to Theo.

 

He knew the chimera never meant to hurt him. And the thought somehow gave him strength to go on. Because even if he was part of Theo’s past now, he knew he meant something to the older man. He was sure that every time Theo said he loved him, he meant it. Every tight hug, every time Theo’s eyes sparked when Liam told him he loved him, every whispered moan on his ear when they made love; they weren’t just to please Liam. They were _real_ , because Liam was a werewolf, and he could feel Theo’s chemosignals.

 

He shook his head negatively, trying to push away those thoughts. He looked around and froze as he saw a familiar figure by the other side of the lake. Liam diverted his look and walked towards the exit, wishing with all his heart that Theo hadn’t seen him. The werewolf couldn’t stop the thought that it was ridiculous that he dreamed about meeting the chimera so many times; he thought about doing so many things: hugging, kissing, saying he missed him and he was sorry; but the only thing he could do now was hide and run, like a frightened animal.

 

He sped up his steps until he felt a hand on his shoulder. Liam turned around and instinctively took a few steps back, in a self-defense gesture, like he might hurt him. He knew Theo would never hurt him, but he was shocked and somewhat scared. His heart was beating so fast it was painful.

 

Theo offered a small and kind smile as Liam kicked himself mentally for probably looking like an idiot.

 

“I’m not gonna hurt you.” Theo said; voice soft and steady. “It’s been a while, Liam.”

 

The scene would be comical if wasn’t tragic. Liam could almost laugh at his audacity, but he just stood still, staring at his damn handsome face.

 

“I’m fine, thanks for asking. And how about you, Liam?” He asked again. Liam rolled his eyes, not being able to stop the thought he was adorable.

 

“How do you want me to be, after all this time?” Liam retorted the question, finally finding his voice, trying not to show how shaky his emotions were in the moment, and knowing he failed miserably.           

 

A string of pain sparkled on Theo’s eyes and he watched Liam’s blue irises for a moment. He bit his lips, something he only did when he was anxious. Theo used to say it made them cracked and he hated it.

 

“Probably thinking I am dumb, insensitive, stupid, ridiculous, tactless and anything that would fit to describe a person who did the stupidest mistake by leaving his precious little wolf. Though I’m not sure I’m still allowed to call you that.”

 

Liam turned his face, not wanting the older boy to see tears wetting his eyes.

 

He was used to the pain, but this feeling, this tight feeling inside him was hurting way too much, almost preventing him from breathing. Liam heard the ducks swim from a distance, and a particularly cold breeze caress his face, a shiver running through his body making him shrink on the coat he was wearing.

 

“Liam, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I hurt you. I’m sorry for making you cry when all I wanted was making you smile. I’m sorry for not staying, I’m sorry for being a coward.”  Theo’s voice sounded strange to Liam’s ears. Theo was always confident and somewhat cocky.

 

Liam sobbed, closing his hands into fists, sinking on his own selfishness, letting himself be taken by the longing that consumed him completely.

 

Theo’s apology hurt Liam and made something break inside him, but he wasn’t sure it was due his own pain or Theo’s pleads, but he was weak enough to let the older man pull him against his body, hugging him tightly.

 

“Why?” Liam whispered, as he hesitantly wrapped his hands around the chimera’s waist. “You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting.”

 

“I know.” Theo whispered back. “I just… Thought you would be better without me. Whenever we fought, you always said you wanted to be as far from me as you could, and you couldn’t stand the fights anymore. There’re a lot of better people than me out there Liam, and I thought you could find happiness with a brighter person, someone who didn’t make you so restless all the time. A person who didn’t do such bad things and had so many bad things inside him. But I’m selfish; I can’t picture myself without you, not anymore. So please I-” Theo faltered, hugging the smaller boy a bit tighter against him, like he was afraid he was going to disappear any time soon.

 

And it seemed that their limit had been reached.

 

So many requests, so often begging for things they didn’t know the other could give.

 

Liam listened to each sentence and absorbed it, and kept every pain.

  
  
It didn’t matter if Theo’s fingers were squeezing his own hands so hard that his digits were  numb.

 

Liam just wanted to drown on him once again.

 

“Please. Forgive me.” Theo pleaded, voice still affected.

 

Liam was silent for a while, eyes closed as he listened to Theo’s unsteady heartbeats. He knew he was weak and he knew Theo already had his answer, even if the chimera still didn’t know. Over all those months, his departure had opened a wound in his chest that could only be healed by his heat and his presence. Liam was twenty when Theo was gone, he just turned twenty two now. It had been one year and some months but at the same time it felt like ages to him.      

 

“Theo, I…” Liam started.

 

“I love you.” Theo said, voice low, but full of emotions and honesty.

 

And Liam knew he was lost. Completely lost.

 

Those simple three words slipped Theo’s mouth easily as Liam buried his face on the curve of Theo’s neck, like those simple words would heal the all the wounds, sorrows and every lost nights between tears and suffering.

 

And something inside Liam told him it did. He didn’t know it was his heart, his wolf or his brain, but he felt warmth invade him, despite the cold weather.               

 

“I always did and I’ll always do too.” Liam whispered, voice so low only Theo’s chimera’s hearing would hear.

 

Liam sighed and rubbed his wet eyes with his hands in a gesture that reminded their sleepy mornings, bathed in sunshine and tender kisses.

 

“I didn’t think I’d find you here.” Liam said, a small smile forming on his lips.

 

“I always come here since I came back to Beacon Hills. I’ve seen you a couple of times, but… I didn’t gather enough courage to approach you and try to start a conversation.”

 

“That’s what you’re doing right now.” Liam affirmed, almost sarcastically.

 

Theo seemed to ponder about it, before shrugging it.

 

“Yeah, I couldn’t take it anymore.  You look great with your hair longer, by the way.” He commented, touching Liam’s hair gently, sending shivers through the beta’s body.

 

Liam touched Theo’s face, slightly cold for the wind. He looked for some kind of disapproval, but found nothing but expectation. His eyes were shining; beautiful and vivid; facing the beta with such devotion Liam could do nothing but close the distance between their lips.

 

It was like coming back home.

 

He didn’t know the sigh he heard came from him or Theo, but didn’t matter.

 

Their mouths stood pressed together, until Theo parted them, sealing their lips one, two, three times. Just short little pecks, making Liam smile. They locked eyes for a few moments while the beta watched the beautiful features of the chimera’s face.

 

He wrapped his arms around the taller man’s neck, this time in a request for something more. And before he realized, Theo’s hot tongue touched his lips, asking permission to get inside his mouth. Liam happily welcomed the warmth of his kiss; closing his eyes and enjoying the moment, allowing Theo take his time, always touching Liam’s skin, caressing his neck, making his toes curl inside his sneakers.

 

Theo’s kissed a path down Liam’s jaw, his lips lightly touching the soft skin, earning a satisfied sigh as Liam raised his fingers and entangled them on the soft strands of the chimera’s hair. Theo held Liam’s face with his hands, deepening the kiss and nibbling gently on the beta’s lower lip, making him smile. They parted the kiss and joined their foreheads for a moment, trying to calm their breaths.

 

“Your kissing is still amazing.” Theo remarked, smirking.

 

“You’re still an idiot.” Liam murmured, blushing.

 

“And you’re still short. But that’s ok, because it means you’re still my _little_ wolf.” Theo said smiling and kissing the top of his head.

 

Liam faked an irritated expression, but ended up smiling back. They walked side by side to the park’s exit, towards _their_ apartment, and Liam couldn’t help but feel happy that September might not be as lonely as he previously thought.

 

 _["And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did,_  
_And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did"]_

 

**END.**

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks everyone for reading! Once again, review and leave kudos if you do! ♥♥♥
> 
> Let's spread Thiam love, the most beautiful pairing of all!


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